Crazy Emergency Productions

If the pen is mightier than the sword, then the keyboard is at least as good as a stick in the eye. Crazy Emergency scribe Jesse Lawler writes narratives, opinion pieces, and shocking travelogues, as well as love-notes to his parole officer.

High-Yield, Low-Risk Income From LEAPS Stock Options - Barry Lawler - Sept 10th, 2007
Revel in both your fear and greed, with this useful how-to guide for options traders.

Investing Naked - Barry Lawler - May 14th, 2006
Stripped-down financial advice from senior market analyst (and senior Lawler-family writer) Barry Lawler.
OP-ED: Rifting the Republicans - April 2nd, 2005
An obvious proposal for American politics that everybody will, unfortunately, hate.
2003 Kiwi Xmas Tour - December 2003

In preparation for a full seaborne invasion of New Zealand during summer of 2005 (complete with frigates, beach-balls, etc.), Crazy Emergency Productions scouted the South Island during Yuletide 2003. Here is the journal.
OP-ED: Nursery-School Nuclear Policy - June 3rd, 2002
Just think what your mom might have accomplished with nuclear weapons...
2002 Escape From LA Tour - April/May 2002

In spring of 2002, Jesse Lawler split LA for a cross-the-U.S. bicycle trip. Here is the incriminating evidence.
How to Poop at Work - Winter 2001

In certain circles, this might qualify as the script for an educational film, but we're not exactly sure who those circles are...

Suicide Regimen Director's Journal

A travelogue of adventures in low-budget film land.

- First Installment - August 2001

- Second Installment - November 2001

- Third Installment - January 2002

OP-ED: Who's Afraid of the Big, Bad Clones? - November 27th, 2001
Human cloning versus human chickens.
OP-ED: Nice Guys Finish Dead - November 7th, 2001
Offense/defense analysis early in the War on Terror.
OP-ED: Shopkeeper Nation - October 2001
A piece on the pros and cons of ethnic profiling in the wake of 9/11.
OP-ED: New World Revenge - September 17, 2001
An early "Yikes! What do we do about 9/11?" piece.
Beer, Boats, and Invisible Goats - Spring 2001
A travelogue of a post-collegiate Spring Break: Los Angeles, Lake Havasu, the Grand Canyon, and beyond...
Propulsion - January 2001
A super-short script about responsible driving.
Bounty - March 2000

An experimental script trying to fit a classic Western into ten pages.
(It came out eleven.)
clipping from Suckerpunch - November 1999
An orphaned scene off the cutting-room floor of a feature script.
How to Advance in the Mob - March 1999

A super-short one act theater piece probing why so many Italian-American criminals are also good dancers.